Ch 2: Kindred Spirits
Why?
That’s the question of the hour it seems.
Why do I stink?
Why is there a ray of light attacking my eyes?
Why does it feel like someone’s using a jackhammer on my head?
What is that annoying buzzing-slash-ping sound that wants to destroy me?
I open one eye and cringe.
Why am I wearing my LBD in bed?
Why does my hair smell like smoke and my mouth taste like ass?
And there’s that ping sound again. Shut up.
“Shut up!” I shout into the empty room. Ow. No. No more shouting. Please.
I look over to my right and see a tall glass of water and a dose of Tylenol on a little napkin. I have angels watching over me. I truly do.
I also notice the little light flashing on my phone accompanying yet another set of pings and buzzes. Everything hurts, though, so I down my pills with the water and slowly... very slowly, grab my phone.
I set your alarm for you. Meet us for breakfast at Sue’s.
Alice.
Good morning, Hun. Just checking to make sure you’re still alive. Garrett misses you.
Mom.
Hey bitch, wtf are you? I’m hungry.
Rose.
I look at the clock. 10 A.M. I feel like I slept five minutes. So not fair.
Mom’s first.
G’morning, Mom. I’m up. Just getting some breakfast w/the girls. Will pick up G at noon. Tell him I love him.
Will do. Love you baby.
Yeah. My mom’s the best.
I text Rose next.
Chill the eff out, woman. I’m on my way. Order me my usual.
You’re bossy when you’re hungover.
The diner is your typical greasy spoon, but holds a hell of a lot of memories for us: everything from late-night munchies, to after-school meet ups, to the site of our joint graduation party. Sue was the third-generation family owner and basically a second mom to all of us.
“Bella, my dear! I was wondering when you’d pop in! I was beginning to think you didn’t love me anymore. C’mere and give me a hug.”
“Hi, Sue,” I cough as her embrace squeezes the life out of me.
Did I mention my monster headache? Jackhammers. I mentioned jackhammers.
“Well, look at you. As beautiful as ever,” she says, holding me at arm’s length before leaning in to whisper, “I heard what happened. I knew that boy was all wrong for you, muffin. But, at least you got your little boy out of it. Oh, by the way, when are you gonna bring him over to meet his Auntie Sue? I gotta start fattening him up!”
Sue chuckles as I sit next to Alice, who’s giggling at Sue’s antics. Rose gives me the bitch-brow while sipping her coffee.
I scratch my nose with my middle finger.
“How about I bring him by next weekend? He starts kindergarten this week, so it might be a little crazy.”
Sue’s smile brightens. “Ohhh, How exciting! I do remember you girls on your first days at school. Charlie brought all of you over for milkshakes to celebrate. And look at you all now. Rose is married with a beautiful family, you have little Garrett, and Alice...”
Sue stalls. She thinks every woman’s success centers around being married with kids.
Clearly, this is not the case with Alice.
But Alice takes it all in stride.
“...Aaaannd, I have a successful business and couldn’t be happier!”
Sue recovers. “Oh, yes, of course, dear! Of course. Well, I’ll um, get you some more coffee.”
I look down to see my plate of bacon, eggs and french toast waiting for me.
Mmm... Bacon.
“So, do you remember anything from last night?”
Rose. Always straight to the point.
“Yes, Rose. I wasn’t totally wasted. It was fun.”
“Fun... Yeah, I bet it was fun making out with a hot stranger.” Alice giggles again, her hazel eyes bright and sparkly. She’s evil under all that positivity.
I don’t know how she does it, but Alice never has a hangover. Ever.
“Not a total stranger. We... talked some before we, you know... kissed.”
Rose again. “Uh, you did a little more than kiss. Do you remember dancing with him?”
I try to navigate through the cloudy memories from last night. I remember the tall, gorgeous guy at the bar, then on the dance floor. His name... damn it, his name...
Edwin?
Elmer?
Evan?
Edward?
Yes! Edward.
“Of course I remember dancing with Edward, fuck you very much.”
“Well, then, do you know his last name? Where does he work? Does he live in Forks? Can’t be because we would’ve seen him, so that means, no...”
Rose fires off questions I’m not even listening to, because my brain cannot function until I have my second cup of coffee, which Sue just refilled.
“Slow down there, detective,” I say, holding my hand up. “We never got far enough to discuss those things so...”
“Yeah, because you were practically humping on the dance floor and when I pulled you away from him in the booth,” Alice replies with a snicker.
More conversation. More Coffee. And before I know it, it’s time to pick up my little man.
My parents’ house is filled with wonderful memories. As I pull up the driveway, I see little bits and pieces of my past.
There’s the bottom porch stair that creaks when you step to the right. My initials etched into one of the wooden banisters. The porch swing where Alice and I used to talk about boys.
Or Alice used to talk about boys. I would just listen. Those were the days no one needed to know I had a crush on Peter, the class nerd.
I’ll take that to my grave.
He’s probably the CEO of some big IT company now and, with my luck, probably hot.
“Mommy!” I’m nearly bowled over as a little force knocks into me, arms wrapping tightly around my waist.
Garrett.
My reason for living. My best creation. My son.
I smile down at him, prying his arms off to get a good look. “What the hell’s on your face?”
“Bella! Watch your mouth!” My mother materializes on the porch behind us, her voice good-naturedly scolding.
“Sorry, Mom. But what’s on his face?”
“Grandma let me have chocolate cake!” All I see is brown hair, blue eyes, brown mouth, and chocolate-stained teeth.
“Oh, yeah? Well, Thanks, Grandma for the extra sugar and the crash to come later. I truly appreciate it.” Mom tilts her head and purses her lips. See? She gets my sarcasm.
“Sweetie, why don’t you go grab your stuff, I’m sure mommy has things to do with you today?” Mom pats him on the head. “And don’t forget to wipe your face, dear!”
“Okay!” Garrett shouts, running back into the house.
Once he’s out of earshot, my mother turns her attention back to me. “So, did you have a good time last night?”
“Yep, it was fun.”
I find it’s best to stay short and concise with my answers to her questions.
“What did you girls do?”
“Went to that club in the warehouse district.”
“Meet any cute guys?”
And, there it is.
“I talked to one, yes.”
Talking is a very broad term for what Edward and I did, I know. Can’t give mom too much information though.
“Did you get his number?” She wiggles her eyebrows.
“Um, no. It wasn’t like that, Mom. And even if it was, I’m really not ready. You know that.”
She pats my shoulder gently. “Oh, I know, baby. But you gotta get out there. You never really had a chance to be flirty and single.”
“Flirty and single? Mom, stop reading Cosmo.” She crosses her arms, but says nothing else. I lean in just enough through the doorway to see Dad watching the Mariners.
“Hey, Dad.”
“Hey, pumpkin!” He shouts at the screen, waving a hand in the air.
“Okay! I’m ready, Mommy!” Garrett yells as he returns with his stuff, chocolate hastily smeared around his mouth. I roll my eyes at his face-washing attempts. He’s nearly frenetic in his sugar high. Boundless energy, this kid.
“Awesome. Say ‘thank you’ to Grandma and Grandpa.”
“Thank you, Grandma. Thank you, Grandpa!”
We wave as we walk away. As much as I rag on my parents, they’re always there for me. I’m thankful. They know it.
“Where are we going?”
“I thought it’d be great to head into Port Angeles today and finish getting the rest of your school supplies. Then, maybe a movie?”
“Yessssss!! Can we get ice cream?”
“Oh, no, I don’t think so, buddy. How about we get some pizza in you and then we’ll take it from there. You’ve had enough sugar to last you the day.”
“Aw, man.”
I love this kid.
“You excited about your first day at school?”
I glance in the rearview mirror to see Garrett looking out the window, the smile gone from his face.
“Hey, what’s up?”
He looks back at my reflection.
“Do you think they’ll like me, Mom?”
“Who’s they?”
“All those kids? What if they don’t like me?”
“Well, then they don’t know what they’re missing, now do they?”
More silence.
“You know what, G? I felt the very same way before my first day at school.”
“Yeah?”
“Absolutely. There was a story your grandma use to read to me when I was little called Anne of Green Gables. It was about a little orphan with red hair who started out in a new town, facing her first day at school. She was so afraid she wouldn’t be able to find a friend, a kindred spirit.”
“What’s a kindurred spirit?”
I smile to myself, careful not to let him see me.
“Someone special, buddy. Someone who gets along with you because you have so much in common. I promise you something. You may not make a ton of friends, but you’ll find one good friend. And that’s more important than having thirty kids who are only ‘sometimes’ your friends.”
“You’re smart, Mommy.”
I laugh. I can’t hold it in.
“Maybe, buddy. But I doubt it.”
More silence follows, and I think he’s probably onto some other subject in his head.
“Is Daddy coming to see me on my first day of school tomorrow?”
I was just hoping that wasn’t the subject he was mulling over.
“Um, I don’t know. I don’t think so, sweetie. I’m sure he wants to be there more than anything, but he’s got a lot going on. And plus, he’s all the way in Seattle.”
“Yeah.” His defeated sigh is painful to hear. I really wish his father wasn’t such an asshole.
We arrive in PA just in time for an early movie, then supply shopping, then dinner. Pizza. Like I promised.
As I watch him eat, I wonder about the whole ‘kindred spirit’ thing. Does it apply to relationships too? Mike was definitely not my kindred spirit, or soul mate, or whatever. I don’t even think that exists.
But... I keep wondering. What if there is a soul mate for me? My thoughts go to Edward, don’t ask me why.
I scoff at the thought, actually.
I met him at a bar, we danced (and I use the term loosely), and we made out. I didn’t give him my number. But then again, he didn’t ask for mine.
He was just a guy. A hot one, I remember that much even in my drunken state.
But still. Just a guy. He was probably just visiting. I’ll probably never see him again.
Probably.
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